Monday, March 31, 2008

Cinematic gold

Tonight the Mysterious X and I watched the utterly brilliant Queen of Outer Space, starring Zsa Zsa Gabor. During this movie, I learned several interesting facts:

1. 1957 + 22 years = 1985

2. If a planet's gravity is similar to Earth's gravity, that planet has a breathable atmosphere.

3. If you suffer from radiation burns, you will instantly become a homicidal tyrant.

4. Women are nothing without children.

5. If your friend is being attacked by a giant rubber spider, you should light the spider on fire.

6. One must always wear gloves when canoodling with a girl one intends to abandon for the first Venusian to cross one's path.


Life lessons, to be sure.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Actually, a planet's gravity does play a pretty big part in determining the makeup of its atmosphere. Along with temperature, gravity defines the planet's escape velocity, which determines which molecules are trapped and which aren't. At first, anyway. Then life comes along and messes everything up. Stupid life.

Also, I really love how in Mars Attacks! the aliens have to wear helmets because they breathe nitrogen :)

Now if you'll excuse me, I need to go squeeze out a couple of kids.

CelloShots said...

Sadly Venus, the planet in question, is not a dead planet, as our heroes initially believe. Of course, they assume that the planet is dead while standing in a tropical jungle. Clearly Venusian plants are non-living.

Another interesting fact about Venus: while having accidentally landed on Mars is viewed (by at least one of our heroes) as a plausible situation, having accidentally landed on Venus is inconceivable.

In short, you must see The Queen of Outer Space!